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How to have a successful first date.

What to do on a first date.

The terms “successful first date” and “what to do on a first date” are not usually used in the same sentence. However, we did it just to see if we could. It is possible! Here’s what we learned.

How to decide whether a first date should be a fling or a relationship.

When to give up on a relationship.

On the first date, you’re curious and maybe even a little confused. You probably want to talk about your innermost thoughts about love and lust, but you don’t know quite how to bring it up. Should you ask about her family? About her job? What if you’re interested in a relationship with her but she’s not? What if she asks you about your job? What if she’s in a relationship already?

You can’t go on this date alone, so you need to know how to do it right. Here’s what to do:

Ask Questions

This is a date. Anything goes. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or ask for clarification. You don’t need to know everything about each other, but you do need to know if you want to give it a shot at dating. Plus, not knowing all the stuff you don’t know doesn’t mean that she knows nothing.

Let Your Date Decide

We’re not saying that you shouldn’t tell your date anything. We just mean that you need to respect that she knows more about herself than you do. Let your date tell you what you want to know. If she doesn’t, that’s okay. You’ll have a chance to ask her again. Remember: you’re going to have to do the work to get to know her. Don’t be offended if she doesn’t tell you everything about herself or why she’s seeing you.

Be Yourself, But Don’t be a Doormat

She’s going to notice if you seem to be trying too hard to be someone you’re not. Let her get a taste of what you’re like, but don’t come off like a weirdo who’s afraid of commitment. You don’t want to seem cheesy or awkward. Be real and have fun, but you also need to take yourself seriously and be a little sure of yourself. This will definitely help you ease into a relationship.

Put your Best Foot Forward

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Note: This post was originally published in May 2015. We’ve updated it with new information from dating apps such as Tinder and OKCupid, as well as information from the New York Times, and some new apps that are releasing to the public in 2015.

Getting Started

1. Have a Plan

If you’re new to Tinder or your attempt at a relationship, keep in mind that today’s speed dating apps are different than they used to be. Back in the 90’s, you’d be lucky if you got three minutes of chat with someone on a basic dating app. Now, guys have to pick up a girl within 30 seconds to one minute, and I’ll be your hat.

The better you prepare yourself, the better your odds.

Does this sound harsh? Remember that in the past, your only means of seeing a new potential mate was through profile pictures, brief bios, and maybe a cheeky message. In today’s app, you can pick up the person’s location by looking at the little’ready’ bubble on their profile. You can speak with them for 10 to 20 seconds. Back in the day, you could say ‘Hi, how are you’ and receive a one-word response. Today, you have to reel them in so they’ll give you more of their profile. Since you have to pick up a girl so fast, you need to do your research. Use some of the tips and tricks mentioned below so you have a chance to make a good impression and improve your odds of success.

2. Tailor Your Profile to Your Situation

The key to getting a date is to tailor your profile to the situation. If you’re playing the field, change up your profile. Download Snapchat, Tinder, Plenty Of Fish, and other apps to have fun and meet people—use the app to your advantage.

Playing the field is overrated, but if you have some experience, try and be a little more creative. Think about whether you’re looking for a casual hookup, a person who is like you, a girlfriend, a long-term partner, or marriage. Make your profile reflect that. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship, don’t take it too personally. If you meet some really great people, you may have a chance to find a like-minded person, but if you meet someone who is a jerk, you’ll need to cut your losses. If you’re looking for a hookup, go for the

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Almost all of us begin dating in a fairly awkward, innocent, and fallible way. It can be a learning process. The following pieces of advice are all simple—however, they may change the way you look at dating.

Going on A Date

Say No More Than Three Times

First dates are tough for everyone. And for women? Oh, the embarrassment if someone says no before making a move. (Maybe you’re a cougar after all?) However, you must force yourself to turn down more and more dates. Say no to the first guy who asks you out, no to the second, and no to the third. One or more of these guys is not for you, and one is almost certainly the Mr. Right out there.

You might feel that you’re being overconfident, but you have to get it out of your system. In fact, if you’re getting hit on, don’t be afraid to turn down two or three dates in the course of one week. You will survive. As a young woman, I found that the best way to do this was to have a step-by-step plan—and not be afraid to stick to it.

Get Your Price Right

Yes, I know, this is advice for men. But for women, we really need to stop being such Good Samaritans. No one wants a nagging, catty girlfriend. If he’s interested in you, he’ll be able to tell. If he hasn’t called you back after a week or two, there’s a reason: He either doesn’t find you attractive or, worse, finds you boring.

Before you go on a date, plan what you’re going to wear. You might feel like throwing on something you haven’t worn in a while and pairing it with your favorite jeans, but try it on first. You don’t want to end up in a cheesy t-shirt when the guy you like is wearing a shirt and tie.

No Rejection

Being dumped or rejected sucks, whether it’s on a one-on-one level or a group one. If you’re alone, it’s going to be doubly hard, and if you’re with friends, you’re going to look bad. A great way to deal with this is to say that you don’t want to move forward with the guy in question.

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Dating Sites: Don’t Get Scammed

What is it about online dating that is so intimidating? It could be that online dating gives new meaning to the term, “over-sharing.” With that said, here are some tips to keep you safe while dating online. First, think of dating as an endless series of first dates. You probably don’t want to be a statistic, so get out there and meet people for real (or just act like you are). Don’t send an unsolicited message that ends with, “What’s your number? I’m right outside.” Be a little romantic.

Second, take your time. If you’re not sure about this person and their intentions, taking a week to think about it is probably going to be more productive than jumping in too quickly. If you are looking for someone special, it’s important to take your time and find someone who clicks. If you’re just looking to go down the road a little, don’t get hung up on trying to figure out how much time you’re going to spend with this person. If you’re in a rush, that shows in your emails and texts and in the interactions you have.

If you go on a first date or go on a series of dates with someone who is evasive with answering emails or who doesn’t seem to take you seriously, the chances are good that they are just not who you want to be with. Know that they probably don’t want you to read this. If you want to read it, have them email you and let you know that. Chances are high that they may want to change their handle or alter some of their communications in order to protect their identity and keep you at arms’ length. If you’re not that interested in someone, don’t waste your time asking them to do things that you don’t want to do. That’s how you get scammed.

Rid yourself of any expectations on a first date. Don’t ask what their dream house looks like or if they want children yet. You have no idea about their intentions or what they’re like beyond what you see in front of you. If someone is seeing you on their terms in a way that you’re not, be cautious about what you say and how you act. If you get lost in the shopping and comparing of menu items, or they are. Just. Not. Doing. That, you probably don’t have much of a chance of getting anywhere with this person.

Dating Sites to

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What you’re about to read is a list of dos and don’ts. The question is, are you ready to get a little pickier, maybe try out some new dating apps and become a bit more selective?

Before you reply, a note for men: The “T” in “DTF” stands for “Take a fucking chill pill, dude.”

When you say you’re not interested in having sex on the first date, you’re putting yourself in a position to be taken advantage of. There are a handful of people out there who will get their rocks off by doing absolutely nothing and treating the first date like a porn shoot. And frankly, many men will get off on that. They’ll say things like, “Wow, I’ve never actually had sex with a real woman before. I’m going to go home and Google her. I can’t wait!”

I understand the excitement; I’ve had to “google” plenty of women myself, or at least swipe on their photos.

But you should make it clear right from the start that you aren’t a player, that you respect yourself and the women you are meeting. Even if she doesn’t get the message, it’s better to be clear and upfront than to end up in an awkward situation later down the road.

This is not to say that women should be uncomfortable with casual sex.

Of course, in many cases people can be clear about what they want without getting into the nitty-gritty first. You can be a romantic, thoughtful date and still not expect anything afterward.

But don’t mistake someone’s discomfort with the idea of “let’s wait and see” with a lack of interest. The fact that a person is hesitant to accept a first date proposal doesn’t mean they don’t want to be a part of yours.

That said, guys: You’re responsible for clearing any misconceptions from the get-go.

If you go on a first date with a woman you met online, you’re not only committing to a dinner, but also a lengthy, emotional journey with another human being. You need to know her in your mind before you turn the power back on.

In addition, when you go on a first date with a woman you’ve never met face to face, you may get a glimpse of her personality. There’s a chance you might get a good impression, but there’s also a chance she may come across as conceited or pushy. https://www.nr1dating.net/who-can-i-meet-on-hookup-sites-top-adult-categories-online/
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It’s Your Choice

So you need to ask yourself a lot of questions and be prepared to be honest. If you expect to be taken in by some guy or girl who claims to be in love with you, you will likely be let down. If you decide to be upfront and honest, the effort you put in will pay off in the end. If you do lie to someone or sneak around, you’ll probably regret it in the long run.

Talk to the Right Guy or Girl First

Your dating life will generally be a lot less complicated if you start with people who like you and who share your interests. The unfortunate truth is that dating is a numbers game. If you’re on the lookout for romance, it’s quite easy to find someone who is on the same wavelength as you. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people out there who aren’t interested in anyone who isn’t like them, and in dating someone who has their number, you will probably attract a lot of push-back, and anyone who wants to date a 23-year-old will probably expect you to fall into line and follow along like a dutiful puppy.

So, before you start dating, it’s important to find people who are at least somewhat compatible with you. If you don’t feel that way and you love people who are more traditional, chances are you aren’t going to meet a lot of those people.

Mix it Up

Before we go into the details, let’s talk about the people you should be avoiding and why. For starters, if you’re not mixed race, don’t date someone who is. If you’re white, don’t date someone who is white. If you’re black, don’t date someone who is. If you’re Asian or Native American, don’t date someone who is. If you are a woman, don’t date a guy who is. If you are gay or lesbian, don’t date a straight woman, and vice versa. By no means does this mean that you cannot date outside of your race or ethnicity, but there is no point in letting yourself become a statistic in the minority.

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s go into the details. You can find all of these people by using OkCupid, which is the best way to go about finding them for the following reasons:

You can’t be as picky as you want to be

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Practice

A lot of people claim that being single is the best time to practice love and intimacy. You get to learn a ton about yourself and how you interact with others—perfecting these skills before finding a partner will get you into a much better mindset when you meet someone. If you’re single, now is the perfect time to get into this practice. Before you actually start dating, perfect the dates that you have through practice. Don’t worry about every detail—you don’t want to say something stupid or over-analyze a situation that has nothing to do with you. Instead, focus on enjoying yourself and relaxing.

This could be anything from eating out at a restaurant to watching a movie with your friends to just hanging out at the park. Play around with the different options and find out which ones you can fit into your schedule. Keep in mind that even if you do this, you’ll still be learning from the process. Besides, your date won’t have to wait around while you try to rehearse.

Know Your Audience

Audience interactions are so important—you have to know how you’d feel in the different scenarios. If you’re in a new relationship, you shouldn’t act like the new girl in high school. The audience is going to know you as their new girlfriend. If you’re not sure, ask your partner or a friend who’s already been in a relationship. When it comes to dates, try to prepare your conversations as much as you can. You don’t want to have a phone conversation with your date and realize halfway through that you forgot to schedule time with them. (This is not an excuse to be cold—just be clear about what you want.) When it comes to conversations, do your research on your date. Find out what your date’s interests are, what their preferred forms of entertainment are, etc. If you’re a girly girl who’s into flowers and romance, don’t assume that’s what your boyfriend is or will like. Your dates want to be on a date with their ideal person, so don’t force them into a box.

Communication

The challenge with talking to your date is that you don’t know if they want to talk to you at all. A lot of people think that going on a date is all about just having fun. But it’s also about communicating and laying the groundwork for what’s to come. You don’t have to take the conversation strictly serious—you could easily end up in an awkward http://www.singles-personals-ads.com/articles/how-to-have-sex-on-hookup-apps-nsa-affairs-tutorial
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Ladies, you need to step up your game! I’m not talking about your jeans or shoes or your hair. I’m talking about your dating skills. Whether you’re going on a few first dates or you’re dating on a regular basis, these tactics will help you woo your man. They’ll help you to make a good first impression, they’ll help you approach situations from the right angle, and they’ll help you get the most out of your dates so they lead to something more. They’re going to help you unlock the door to a great relationship. Which leads us to…

Step One: Learn What He Wants

Let’s get one thing straight: The most important thing you need to know about yourself is what you want from a partner. As a guy, I don’t know how many times I’ve been with my friends and later felt like we had nothing in common. I’d go on a first date with someone, and sometimes I’d make plans, but when it was time to settle down and actually date, I would want to know a lot more about them than they wanted to know about me. The key to unlocking the door to a successful relationship is knowing yourself and understanding what you want. Every guy likes to feel desired, but there is a difference between the way you act and the way you are, and that’s something you need to know for yourself.

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To demonstrate this, I want you to write down ten characteristics that you think are attractive in a mate (real, physical characteristics, not just how you think she should act or what you expect her to act like). When you are ready to share those characteristics with your date, just do it.

You can also go old school and list the traits that you want in a potential partner from Marge Schott. Here’s an example of someone who clearly needs some work:

Ok, so let’s take a look at the breakdown. Notice that these all fall under the “Physical” category: (a) eye color, (b) hair color, (c) hair length, (d) height, (e) race, (f) gender, (g) age, and (h) body type/size.

So let’s see how our friend from the previous example would be rated, and why he may not have the best odds for a long-term relationship.

If your date doesn’t match up very well with your list, don’t panic!

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Unlike the sexualized, mass-marketed dating world we’ve come to know over the past few years, being confident about yourself doesn’t make you overbearing or pushy. Being honest with yourself about your looks, personality and worst characteristics will help you find someone you’re honestly interested in. Remember: The more confident you feel, the more positive, uplifting, and honest your date will likely feel.

First and foremost, know your own limitations. Do you have or develop bad allergies? Are you prone to sudden migraines? Do you have faulty kidneys? Know your weaknesses and use them to inform your plans for a great date.

Particularly on dates with someone you really like, try to see what common interests you share or what kind of things you do together. Rather than mentioning your favorite band or movies, focus on talking about things you like in the real world. A lot of guys don’t share their interests with women because they fear rejection. However, many women love to talk about their favorite hobbies. Let your date lead the conversation.

As time goes on, you’ll get a better sense of your date’s interests and values, which will help you come to the perfect compromise. If you try to force the issue, you might be met with a laundry list of reasons why you can’t, and the line between what you want and what you need will start to blur.

No matter what you end up doing, remember that you’re doing it for yourself, not to impress a potential mate. This will make the process much easier.

Who Are You?

The most important thing you can do for yourself on a first date is to get to know yourself. That is, spend time examining who you are and what you like before going on a date with someone else. For the most part, first dates are about getting to know someone and seeing if there’s a connection. Spend some time contemplating what you value in a relationship, what you like about yourself, and what you don’t like about yourself. For example:

What are some of your favorite colors? If they are bright, fun colors like purple, yellow, and green, go with it.

Do you tend to wear skirts or slacks? If so, make sure they’re not too tight or see-through, because you probably don’t want to get that ass-cheek calling at the end of the night.

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On “The Dating Advice Podcast,” host Kristi Kern advises people to take their time and not rush into a relationship. After all, if someone is perfect enough for you that you want to spend the rest of your life with them, why would you rush into something when it’s simply not meant to be?

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to dating, but knowing how to navigate a relationship with confidence should be a given for everyone.

So if you find yourself falling for someone and you want to know how to approach them and tell them you like them, there are some basic steps to take.

Tell Them You Like Them

The first step is to actually tell them you like them, says Kern. You’ve put all this effort into your online profile, maybe you went on a few dates, maybe you went on a few more dates and even have a cute story to share at the bar, etc. etc. But no matter how good you are at communicating, you’ll never get to a stage where you can tell someone how you feel unless they tell you.

In fact, Kern says to treat it like a job interview. Even if you’ve done some research into their life and accomplishments and you feel confident about what you’re saying, you want to make sure the person you’re approaching is comfortable with the conversation, so give it a shot. You’re only going to get a second chance at a first impression, so why not make it count?

To go into the situation properly, it helps to have a couple of go-to lines, so Kern recommends planning ahead on what to say to someone you like. You can use these to either introduce yourself to a person or to move things along. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to dating, but knowing how to navigate a relationship with confidence should be a given for everyone. After all, you don’t want to come across as shy, so it’s best to figure out what to say ahead of time. Kern suggests saying something like:

“I think we’ve gotten to know each other well. I was just wondering how you’re feeling about things?”

Or:

“Do you have any plans for the weekend? I was thinking about going to this waterfall—I heard it’s pretty nice.”

Or:

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes someone attractive—could I get your thoughts on that?”

Regardless of what you say

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Treat Yourself

Despite your best intentions, you’re going to make some mistakes when you’re getting to know a guy. Part of the dating game is learning from your own blind spots. It’s called “playing the best character you know.” But how do you know what kind of character you are? You start by treating yourself the way you’d want to be treated—and don’t be offended if it’s a little embarrassing.

If you’re on a first date, your confidence will likely be higher than it is on a second or third date. But try to pull yourself up a notch even if your date hasn’t noticed or said anything about your acting or your make up. Like putting together an outfit for a date, you have to be comfortable with yourself before you can be comfortable with someone else. Yes, I’m saying that it’s OK to feel good about yourself—your confidence is what will give you the qualities you want in a relationship. If you’ve brought all of your focus to your appearance during a date, you may find that you’re less present because your energy is fixated on your looks.

If you act how you normally do, chances are that you’re comfortable. If you’re really concerned, you can even bring a little something special to remember a great time you had or that delicious dessert you had. After the first date, it may become too late to bring anything. You don’t need to. Look at yourself in the mirror and notice what you did well and what you could have done better. You’re the expert—you know yourself.

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Shop for Dates

The phrase, “throw good money after bad” is more than just a saying. It’s good advice. When you’re in the market to find someone, give some thought to the kind of person you want to spend your time with. If your hopes are lofty (love comes in all shapes and forms), think about the kind of person who will support and help you grow, learn, and accept yourself. If you want to date someone you can share comedy with, consider a comedian. If you don’t want to date guys who might try to force their child into adoption (not me), consider someone who is looking for a committed long-term relationship (such as myself). Think about what kind of people you want to spend time with. Your preferences can change over time. https://onlinedatingcollection.com/hookups-instead-of-dating-where-to-start-if-you-want-nsa-only.php
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Dating is easier today than ever before. In the not-so-distant past, courting had a certain strict code to it: find the right person, have a decent-length conversation, and hope for the best. The world has changed: now, dating has become a bit of an art. Still, whether you’re looking to hit the bar for a rendezvous (a lot of us are), or are looking to find that perfect soul mate who understands what you’re feeling, you’re in the right place. (Like this article? Follow us!) Here’s how to do it.

1. Learn How to Date Now (You Have to Learn This or You Will Fail, I Promise)

As your first step, you need to figure out what you want out of a relationship. Are you looking for a one-night stand? An emotional connection? A life-altering commitment? Lots of dating apps and websites have popped up to help you find what you’re looking for faster, but there’s always more than one way to do things. Before you get down to the nitty-gritty of asking someone out, make sure you have a clear idea of the type of relationship you want to have.

For example, if you’re looking for a crazy hook up, you’re in the right place. (We’ll get to that part later.) But if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, you may want to consider emailing or messaging on a dating app like Bumble, Tinder, or OkCupid. How do you know what you want? You should really think about what your fears and desires are (see: What Women Are Saying About Being Single:

Fear.) For example, if you fear that falling for someone and then finding out they’re not a true match is going to be devastating, you should consider taking the leap into a long-term relationship. What about a one-night stand? If you’re asking yourself how you will approach a one-night stand, let’s face it: This is a tricky one. One-night stands generally tend to have clear cut rules or situations. For example, let’s say you’re on a date with someone, but are so hit the bar with your friends and aren’t feeling it. You’ve got plenty of people who are giving you ‘hit the bar’ looks, so you decide that you’d like to go out and have some drinks with your date. Once you’re out, you get the

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Before you get into a relationship, you need to make sure you’re both on the same page in terms of what you’re getting into. If you’re in love, great—but if you aren’t, it’s not too late. Read on for details about how to cultivate a solid sense of self before even stepping onto the dating scene.

We’ve Got Your Relationship Goals Straight

Looking for a date?

What are you looking for? Do you want a casual encounter or an ongoing relationship? Are you looking for a relationship with someone you’ll spend nights with, or someone you’d like to build a life with? It’s okay to have preferences, but as long as you’re honest about them with yourself and with the person you’re dating, you’ll find someone who’s a good fit.

Just be aware that some people will resent being in a relationship, and others will resent the fact that you’re searching for one at all. (If that makes you nervous, read up on a new dating app and skip the dating scene entirely.) You’re going to get messages every day from potential dates. If you don’t want to read them, just set your dating app to block messages from anyone without a mutual connection.

While it’s perfectly acceptable to open your dating app once you’re officially ready, it’s still pretty weird. No matter how well you know someone, it’s going to be obvious to anyone looking at your photos that you’re looking for someone special. Even if you’re really confident, don’t be nervous to show some vulnerability—your potential dates know that you’re insecure, and it’s a good way to show how much you care.

Setting up an OkCupid account is free, and we recommend signing up. While the free account is limited in some respects (for instance, you can only set preferences in one area), it’s still a great place to start. If you really feel like you want to start off your search for a relationship with someone, a paid OkCupid account lets you tailor your search based on criteria. It gives you a lot of power over what you’re looking for in a person, so if you’re looking for someone who’s in shape and likes to travel, OkCupid is a great place to start.

If you just want to meet people, a dating site like OkCupid is a great place to start. If you want to start serious, OkCupid lets you http://www.pegasusdating.co.uk/articles/best-adult-hookup-in-uk-what-to-expect-from-british-sex
I’m continually impressed at how newbie-friendly the relationship world has become. Sites like OkCupid.com, Match.com, and Tinder have put the world of dating at our fingertips, and are even allowing people to make a match with the help of their computers. Whether you’re looking to fall in love with a cute guy next door, a bargain-basement partner, or just a piece of ass, check out the sites and apps that will help you get it right the first time.

OkCupid

Photo by Amanda Koelliker

OkCupid.com launched in 2002 and is already one of the country’s most popular online dating sites. The site was built to have a laid-back approach, and reminds users that they are simply a person on a dating site: “We’re not trying to help you find the perfect match; we’re trying to help you find the right match.” To sign up, visit OkCupid.

Google Search

The site, which uses the website’s search results to pair up users based on their profiles, is similar to PlentyofFish.com, except OkCupid.com doesn’t charge a fee to start your search. Instead, you can join the site for $29 a month.

Free

OkCupid was one of the first dating sites to expand into mobile, and the app on all mobile devices has since surpassed 90 million downloads, making it one of the most downloaded apps on Google Play and Apple’s iTunes store.

Monthly subscriptions range from $20/month to $80/month depending on how many features you want to use, and new users can try the site for free for a month.

Tinder

Tinder is becoming one of the biggest dating sites in the world, and with good reason: The service takes a unique approach to the complicated dating world. Instead of pretending that the entire dating world is just one giant blind date waiting to happen, Tinder lets you see people within the context of their proximity and surroundings. If two people are within a two-block radius of one another, Tinder will show them to each other.

Tinder isn’t like other dating sites, which require you to fill out detailed questionnaires about yourself, and require you to pay a fee to view other users’ profiles. You can access and view the profiles of people nearby for free, and swipe right on someone you like if they are an interesting match for you

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